Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Not what I was expecting at all

I just got home from vacation.

It wasn't a vacation.

At all.

Well sort off.

I saw a cousin get married. To a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful guy. It was a wonderful, happy time.
Marriages back home are a HUGE event.
Literally thousands of people attend the function. The entire function itself spreads many days. Fantastic food! (I've probably gained 10 lbs just from the 5 days of wedding food alone! It's impossible to resist I tell you!) Plus, the added bonus is that since the extended family gets together, you get to meet everybody - from great aunts and uncles and grandparents to the tiny tots (I discovered to my everlasting astonishment that I was an "Uncle" to half a dozen kids... ME! At my tender young age! An Uncle! Holy smokes! When did I get that old! LOL!) There was a good deal of humor over the fact that so many people assumed that I was my brother! I literally had to produce ID cards and drag my Father in to prove my identity! I had changed so much in six years - folks couldn't recognize me! Haha!

And then, the other HUGE plus point was that I finally got to meet my sister-in-law (my brother got married almost 2 and 1/2 years ago... but I was unable to attend the wedding because of nursing school). My sister-in-law is adorable - I'm so happy she is a part of our family. I even got to enjoy the hospitality of the in-laws. They have some 'characters' in their family too - all the more fun now! I had a great time! :-)

But on the other hand....

I had an acute attack of Gastroenteritis for about four days.
Preceded by the "head cold from hell" for about four days. All I could feel, smell and taste was phlegm. It was horrible.

My Mother was sick for half the time I was home - mostly stress related. Yet she refused to take time off from life in general - insisting that she couldn't. From her PoV she was right, and I knew it... but I hated it no less. I detested the pressures that "life" put on my Mother. My Mother has sacrificed a lot for many people... and many a time, I feel that she is not been acknowledged nor appreciated for that. My desire is for both my parents to retire and live a life of comfort - all the while knowing that such a desire is foolish... both my parents are work-a-holics. They'd go crazy if they had nothing to do!(and it seems like I have inherited some of it!)

My grandma passed away (my Father's mother. My maternal grandma passed away when I was in nursing school and I couldn't attend her funeral. As of now, my maternal grandpa is the only grandparent I have alive - my paternal grandparent having passed away years before I was even born).

My Father didn't take the news well (hell, is there ever a right time to lose your parent?) He has been sick on and off for a while now. I'm worried about him. My dear Father is a reserved man, he doesn't speak often... especially on matters of the heart. He is calm, quiet and reserved [the exact opposite of my dear Mother!] But he is a very sensitive man. Very loving. His anguish at the loss of his Mother was hard for me to bear - I may have lost a loving, dear grandmother, but he had just lost his beloved Mother. In the wee hours of the morning, I was called upon to be a nurse again. My Father had recently lost a mother-in-law and an elder sister. Outwordly, he attempts to be calm and measured - but I know he's hurting. They are a close knit bunch, my Father's family.

Did I mention that I needed 3 root canals? Yep, not one not two... three.

In the midst of all this chaos, I missed the comfort and company of some of my dearest friends. While I am a very friendly, approachable person by nature, I don't make friends that easily (sure, everybody is a "buddy" to me. But true "friends", I'm pretty selective). Despite uprooting my life and relocating half the world away in my teens, I adamantly spent a fortune keeping in touch with my friends. Yeah, I managed to meet some of them... but I missed seeing a couple.

And they hurt.
Because they hadn't seen me in many years.
And I hurt too - for the same reason.
There is still a longing in my heart.

*sigh* I need a vacation to get over this vacation...

1 comment:

Jaime said...

Wow! I got tired just reading about everything. I'm glad you got to enjoy your family. I'm also sad to hear about the loss of your Grandmother. I hope your Dad is ok.

Huge get togethers, although not to the extent you describe, is something I can somewhat relate to. I grew up with 18 cousins. My Mom's side of the family was huge and each Christmas we'd gather at my Grandma's to celebrate. Those are my favorite Christmas memories. I cherish them.


Now the gatherings are wrought with bickering and pettiness. Those cousins have grown and the vast majority are not exactly upstanding individuals. So this year, for the first time, we didn't go.

I was sad but realize it's a part of life. I'm sorry you missed seeing some of your friends. I hope you can get together soon.

It's great to see you back!!! And I'm sorry about that gastro crap. I got a nasty case of it a week ago and I'm still recovering. I can only imagine not being at home suffering with it.